I wanted more than just a chance at motherhood; having children has always been a dream. For as long as I can remember I’ve pictured starting a family one day—just one day very far in the future. Adding to the ambiguity, I’m in a queer, same-sex relationship, and I hadn’t even begun to think about how my partner and I might go about having kids. We weren’t even certain we’d end up together. We’ve been dating for almost two years, and while it seems likely that we are heading in the direction of marriage at some point, we are definitely not ready to have kids together. We’d barely talked about moving in together or whether she’d come to the next Thanksgiving, let alone whether we’d want to conceive biologically, adopt, or foster. We were, and are, at the beginning of considering a life together—a time that should be filled with the glow of possibility, the freedom to dream without commitment.